Struggling with My Whiteness

I was scrolling through Facebook this morning and ran across a post about the Tulsa Race Massacre in May of 1921 (often referred to as the Tulsa Race Riot but turned into a massacre by white vigilantes). https://timeline.com/history-tulsa-race-massacre-a92bb2356a69 I have no memory of ever hearing about this event before today. 

I know that my white privilege has made it easy for me to ignore, overlook, and even consciously and unconsciously suppress these types of events from our history. I can't help but feel pained that any human being would think that killing others, burning their property, and bombing them from the sky is an acceptable way to handle a situation (Even war is evil, sometimes maybe necessary but evil and ultimately it never seems to solve the problem it is suppose to address). Add in the race element and I really don't understand how one group can feel so righteous and superior to another that they can justify such abhorrent and inhuman actions.

A friend and colleague who is an expert in intercultural competency walked through an assessment I did of my intercultural sensitivity and explained the various groupings one can inhabit in this realm of reality. I will not go into all the details but I assessed in a grouping where I devalue my own culture; where I devalue white, middle-class, Protestant, heterosexual, American, male culture. When I read about events like the Tulsa Race Massacre I have a hard time valuing my culture.

I worry that all this can happen again - I know from studying history that it has happened multiple times in cultures far and near. I know that it seems like we humans are wired for one self-defined group to subjugate another in order to gain status and retain power. I know we can sell out our normal compassion and acceptance for a veneer of security. I know all this isn't just a white, middle-class, heterosexual, male, American phenomenon. But as I look out over these United States today I can't help but feel that white America is trying hard to do all these things in order to cling onto some twisted perception of a reality that never was. I cannot help but devalue my culture.

So, I am trying to find ways to remind myself of the good that is very much a part of my culture. I am trying to hold onto that and value it even in the face of so much I cannot value from it. I am trying to hold onto the conviction that my culture can and will rise to a level that will allow us a sense of self that includes the movement in and out of different cultures without needing to value one more than another. I am a firm believer in human evolution and I think that as a species our evolution is not only physical but also psychological, social, and spiritual. I have to believe that as we move into the future we will continue to evolve into the compassionate, empathetic, accepting, loving, beings God has created us to be.

I am a white, middle-class, Protestant, heterosexual, American, male and I grieve what others who are like me are doing. I also celebrate where those like me are making a difference and helping us all to get to a better place. In the future I will share a few of my inspirations that help me value my culture in hopes that they can inspire others (an me) to value who and what they are (I am).

One thing I know for sure, God is with me, with us, as we try and maneuver through the present into the future of a transformed world. May we all look to God for comfort and direction as we seek a way forward.